[[*---you see me smile... you see me laugh... for that is all i let you see...---*]]

Sunday, March 26, 2006

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kanina:

lesson learned today... you could serve the Lord... anywhere...

dapat kasi kanina pupunta ako sa ablaze... ehh... nagtatampo-tampo si mama... kakakonsensya... soobra...

so i stayed home na lang...

waaaaah... i miss anything na talaga... at sobrang nagsisink in na sakin ang grad... sinisimulan ko na nga mga letters ko eh... haba! type written na lang lahat... baka di nila maintindihan pag sinulat ko... ehehehe... la gaanong events... home buddy ako ngeon eh... hehe

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|12:32 AM|

Saturday, March 25, 2006

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sa wakas...
-032406-

ayun... grabe... sa wakas makakapag-update na rin ako!!
hehe...

waaaaaaaah!!! ansaya ng araw ko kahapon!!! woohoo!!

how did it start though??? my day started with the horn honking of our service... yup, nagmistulang alarm clock na lang yung busina ng service ko... so naiwan ako ng service...
waah... mahal pa naman ng pamasahe ko... 40!! i left the house ng around past eight...
hehe... got there... naghagilap pa ko ng makakasama... kasi naman... ala na kaming room... found them sa guidance office -niki, lorie, bry, j9, aljon, alfredo and maricar-... the rest missing in action pa!... ikot kami ng onti for clearance... actually ang napapirmahan ko lang nun ay yung canteen at guidance... waha!!

tapos.. nung napagisip-isip namin ni kits na wala na rin naman kaming mapapapirma... ay nag-aya na kami na oumunta sa gazebo sa calalay... pro well, naunahan na kami dun ng ibang seniors... kaya aming napagdesisyunan na tumuloy na lamang sa new found tambayan namin which was sa mathay1 second floor... and ayun... isa-isang dumating sila fidel, timo at airon na nilead dun ng kanilang instincts! hehe...

kwentuhan ng onti... tapos nag-aya si airon na maglakad na uli ng clearance... ayun... tapos nauna na kami... punta kami sa may h.e. room kasi daw andun si awitan who'd be signing our clearance for econ... dun nakita namin si jemai... tapos... nadaanan din pala namin si kai na nagsabi that we have to brting our costumes sa himig for ma'am to clear us....

tapos... nagpasama si airon sa pinoy center... at nbadtrip xa kay mam villar at ninais sunugin ang pinoy center... hehe... pero after some time ng pagpapahabol ni elsa... pinirmahan din niya yung clearance ni airon... tapos... papirma xa sa canteen, sa guidance... tapos un... edi un... upo-upo na lang kaming dalawa dun sa may admin... tapos dumating si jemai... tapos dumating si val... at napagisipan namin na wala na kaming mapapala sa skul at ninais na naming lumabas... sa may guardhouse... we planned and schemed as to how we could go out... basta lahat na! hehe... then we decided to do it... the legal way... pinapirmahan namin kay mam bandayrel yung letter... and surprisingly... she signed it! hehe...

pero guess what? pinunit nung guard! aba... everyone went ballistic!! we talked to teachers and complained and everyone said we were on the right... hmmm... pero ginawa ko na lang... kinausap namin ni niki ng mahinahon ung guwardya and eventually he agreed to let us go out... san kami after that?? sa LYDIA's!!! hehe... mura dun eh... un... namiss ko na na ang magkakasama ay si kai. ako at si airon... kea natutuwa ako nung magkakasama kami kumain at maglakad...

un... after dun... dots... waha... haba nung game! naka 2 divine na si airon.... natalo pa kami!! hehehe... lakas ni naix eh!... hehe... we won the next game though... hehe

tapos... we finished the games ng around 6 na... wahaha!!... tapos... sa school ksi may dinner yung buong batch... and ako, si kai, kita, j9, aljon, airon, fidel at timo... ay wala nang lamesa... hehehe... kea sumalampak na lang kami sa may labas ng conference hall... saya! kampay!! ehehe... tapos usapan... damayan sa sa pagkanta... kea un! kanta kami ng halik-aegis... at love is all around-wet,wet,wet.... hehehe... tapos... punta kaming bleachers... you know naman... the same crowd... then we had this idea na umupo sa may soccer field... under the stars... hehe... asteeg noh?!?!

sabihan ng thank you's sorry's and hos special you are to me yung session... one by one.. uhmm... yeah... basta... ansarap ng feeling... na ganun kami kabonded... to the point na kami na lang yung nasa school... ansaya na lahat kami ride sa todong kakornihan ng isa't-isa... and shox... ang sakit isipin... na i won't be seeing them everyday anymore... na at one point or another... our roads will split... grabe... pero sana we all won't let that happen! grabe... mahal ko silang lahat!! todo!!!....

ang bitin!!!! why just now? sana nung first year pa lang!!! ehh... well, ultimo si kai ng kagalit ko nung first year ehh diba?! ehehe... haii... i miss them na... hehe... gusto ko na ngang sulitin ang every moment that i could with them eh... waaaaaaaaaah!!!!!! love you anything!!!!!... yan ay ang anytime+anywurz+anyhow+anyway... wahaha...

p.s.: gandang ideya yun kuya tim na instead na nagiisang anyhow si airon... gawin na lang siyang anyone... gets!?!?! any-one... iniwan... waha... corny!!! ahe-ahe-ahe -sarcastic laugh-!!!!

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|1:01 PM|

Thursday, March 23, 2006

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Kahapon:

Black arm bands and all...

Aba, ready to fight for their rights daw ang seniors!!
Lech kasi ung admin… di ba naman kami binigyan ng senior's week!

We were gathered by the cyl officers sa mat perims… pero edtong si marvin… umeepal... so lipat kami sa bleachers…

May pasinong willing-sinong willing cherva pa... pinapikit ung mga tao at tinanong kung sino magbaback-out...
Nyway... so sahil dun... pakabait muna kami... attend kami ng practice kanina... karir todo! Hehe...

Un... lunch... tambay kami sa gazebo ng second year... medyo madami kami nun... hmmm... kulitan... tawanan... banatan sessions... hehe... enjoy naman... kinawawa nga lang si sean at kamille... tapos... andun pa yung mom ni kams... anyway...

Haii... ang saya talaga nun!! Shox... by one o'clock... pinabalik na kami sa covered court... tapos… 2 uwian na din... tapos... Dota uli... ay by the way... kinancel ung boycot!! Kasi daw di naman kami sa mga teachers galit... kay cavo...

Anyway... naka 12 kills ako kanina sa Dota... and 1 death! Hehe... pero un ay dahil lamang sa si Zeus ang gamit ko at sobrang kill stealer un... anyway... tapos... kahit half-heartedly kong ginawa... ay umuwi na ko ng 4... kasi pupunta pa kong church... kakatuwa... im back sa worship team!! Woohoo!!... ayun... kami lang ni justin ang nandun pero ok lang... hehe... gitarista naman namin xa eh... bonding kaming dalawa... kwento-kwento ng mga pangyayare saming buhay... it's fun to know na lahat kami nagdadaan sa mga ganitong bagay... mapa-Christian or not... hehe... kakatuwa lang... I mean, alam ko namang lahat nagdadaan sa ganun... pero... we don't openly share with each other sa church eh... anyway... un... hehe...

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Ang galing ni katherine mcphee ng american idol! Hehe...

Yoko ko pa maggrad!!! Waaaahh... malalaman ko na kung san na talaga ako magkokolehiyo!! Hehe...

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Sige, todong late na ko! Woohoo... pasaway todo!...

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|8:21 AM|

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Just Another Day
-032106-

"at this moment there are 6,470,818,670 people in the world...
some are running scared...
some are coming home...
some tell lies just to make it through the day...
others are just not facing the truth...
some are evil men at war with good...
some are good struggling with evil...
6 billion people in the world...
6 billion souls...
and sometimes...
all you need... is ONE..."
--- peyton, one tree hill

true enough... haven't you ever felt that way? just when you feel like everything is going downhill for you... you think of this one person... and suddenly you smile... coz the thought that that person will be there for you through whatever... is just sooo... calming... relieving... it eases the pain a bit actually... it doesn’t just mean a guy for a girl and vice versa... though this quotation implies that... it could be your friends... family... God...

pero kanina... I was thankful sa mga dyosa... ang sarap ng feeling that there are people who sincerely care for you... who’ll try... atleast try to lend a hand when you fall into crap loads of shit... hehe... thanks sa mga nakinig... you guys made me feel a lot better...

today... Tuesday... ten-10-X days before grad!! Waaaaaaah!

~You can't have too much of a good thing...

Whoever said that... uhmm... right you are!
Actually... my day started well... practice nanaman kami kanina for grad... and we did what was expected of us... xempre we did the opposite... tssk... along with niki... nagliwaliw kami at hinanap ang anything… actually and nandun lang was si fidel, aljon –crush ko-, alfredo – moment ko-, at si mark... well, andun si dada – destiny ko-...

Waha... parang daming lalake sa buhay eh noh... la lang... si aljon ay kacrush-crush naman kasi eh... pero wala lang yun... si alfredo... xa lang kasi nahuhug ko at nkakakulitan todo... kea xa ang moment ko... si dada... sus, klasmeyt ko since grade one... talk about destiny right?

Anyway... anong pinagusapan namin sa mathay1?? Xempre session yun!! Pero kakaiba kasi kulitan at kawirduhan ang topic... saya... then aroung magtu12... bumaba na din kami... onting practice... tapos uwi na!! hehe... lupit namin noh?!

Soo... DOTA? ala, passive... pero namiss ko talaga yung teamwork namin nila niki, aljon at airon... haiii...

Getting to the bad part na... so I went home early to help my mom sa bahay... pero lo and behold.. when I got home... the car wasn't there... and the house was locked... isip ko... baka sinundo lang si mizette from taekwondo and that they'll be home in a couple of minutes... this was around five o'clock...

30 mins later... 530… I was doing quite okey... pero kanina pa kasi lowbat phone ko eh... so nakinig na lang ako ng mp3 ko at nagbasa ng MAD...

1 hour later... 600... fart... inaantok na ko...uhmm... dumidilim na... nilalamok na ko sa labas... sana dumating na sila!

30 mins more... 630... la pa rin!! Maluha-luha na ko... kaw ba naman diba… edi mabulok-bulok ka na nun... la pa naman ako friendship dito!!

Sa wakas... 700 dumating sila! At get this… pinagalitan pa ko kasi daw di nila ako macontact!?! Nung nabuksan ko naman phone ko... isang beses lang silang nagtext!

Wala na ko nasabi... diretso na lang ako sa kwarto ko at naiyak na lang ako...
Tapos... when I came down... sabi ko mama ano po hihiwain... sabi niya... di ako magluluto... sabi ko... ahhh… magseset na lang po ako ng table? Sabi niya... kumain na kami!

Aba! ansaya diba?! Inuwian naman daw nila ko ng empanada... nice naman red ribbon sila kumain at un lang ang dinner ko?! Di na lang ako kumain... hehe

Haiii... kakatopic lang namin kahapon nung mga magulang bat di kayang magsorry... haiii... ganun ata talaga ehh... pero ako... iniintindi ko na lang... sa iba na lang ako naglalabas ng galit... hehe...

Nabadtrip talaga ako grabe!! Pero ngeon? Okey naman na ko... kahit papano... hehe... eto nanaman... tawanan na lang...

Ay... p.s. lang... niki!! naiyak ako!! Hehe!! La lang... tagal ko na gusto umiyak eh... =)... kea kahit ganun nangyare... I feel lighter na now... =)

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Pero... haiii... parang kulang talaga araw ko... nyway... I understand... =)

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2nd p.s.: grabe... nakita ko ung pic ng classroom... yung isang shot ni airon... fart... namimiss ko na yung room... oh no!! grad slowly is seeping in!!!!

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|7:45 AM|

Tuesday, March 21, 2006

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Count down...

11 days before grad. Well, actually if you want to be technical about it... 10 na lang... tignan nio yung time... by the way... happy birthday lanny!

My day... first day of the week... Monday!

Sabi nila you have to start the week well... you know, with a smile on your face and a positive outlook kind a way... so I woke up, realizing "shox, la na nga pala kaming katulog."... buti na lang nasanay na ko sa pag-gising ko...

Realizing na ganito na nga pala sitwasyon... la na... naisip ko na agad lahat ng mga posibleng iutos ng magulang ko mula ngeon hanggang sa dulo ng abril... hehe...

So I took a bath... got dressed... ang lech tong service na toh! di na lang bumusina... I really don't understand why he had to ring our doorbell that sounded a lot like a quiz bee buzzer... grabe... sakit sa tenga... so I hurried off and left 40% of my baon... basta I forgot my 40 pesos sa lalagyan ni mama...

So I rode the service and since antahimik dun... I dozed off... by the time I woke up we were near our school's gate already... I went down hurried off to my friend's and went on with the flag ceremony... announcements... announcements... bladi-bladi-blahs... and since break daw muna before the grad practice... we -fidel, airon, niki, j9, aljon, ako, alfredo, etc..- decided to go to the secone year gazebo... tapos... we ended up sa pagtambay sa bleachers...

Airon showed off his new phone... yung motorolla na razor... picture here, picture there... and tawa-kwento-tawa... after a while... pinatawag na kami uli sa covered court... so grad practice... *yawn**yawn*... and a lot more where that came from... tapos after one round... pinalipat na kmi sa may conference room... yehey! Aircon... un lang ung difference... and well, grad song naman ang agenda... "kaunlaran"... so did we all actually practice? Xempre no! asa naman samin noh!...

After a couple of rewinds nung tape nung song... innanounce nung teacher that we were to have a break... pero we had to come back ng 1240 kasi daw may alumni lecture...

So un... kaming mga hindi nakikinig di namin alam na pwede palang lumabas! Takas pa kunwari kami ni airon... we were free to leave naman pala to begin with! So yun... we went out... grabe... karamihan puro edison... to go where? where else? DOTA!... grabe... yuck yung laro... talo... talo... talo!! Though asteeg yung team ko -aljon, airon, niki, kams and me- I mean, nanalo na kmi before... ewan kinapos kami sa team work...

Well, after that disappointing game... we had no choice but to go back to school... only to learn that we were free to roam around the campus din pala... well, not legally... pero... di naman kami sinita... so we checked muna sa conference hall... the lecture was... well, on going... tapos... lumabas kami ni airon, pumunta kami ng canteen... and sumunod sila niki, timo at aljon... andun pala sa canteen sila kai, j9 at mark...

After nun... pumunta kami sa may mathay1 second floor... and nagkaroon ng mini session... from ghosts, to aliens, to a.i., to family problems... yeah... konek nio na lang...

I'm so blessed talaga na my family is neither broken nor has battery -pambubugbog- problems...

So yun... after a while sumunod si fidel... tapos nalaman namin na tapos na pala yung lecture... so we went down na and met with the rest of the crew... we were scheduled to go to kamille's house kasi... and since nagmomoment ang best friend ko... hanap ako ng iba kong kasabay maglakad... haii... ganyan talaga... hehehe... ayus lang yan... i understand...

Un... we rode in three taxis... kami nila niki, j9, airon at fidel ang magkakasama... I texted my mom na we were going to kam's house... and ang reply lang niya ay... "alam mo naman ang sitwasyon sa bahay eh... bahala ka"... di ka ba naman makonsensya... so sabi ko... sige maaga akong uuwi...

So when we got to kam's house ano ginawa? Wala... hehe... tambay... bonding... etc... etc... etc... tampo mode pa ang isang dyosa... pero anyway... we got that ironed out naman na... yahoo!

Uhmmm... moments... na I decided to cut short na rin... they were just tooo much in one day... anyway... maaga na din kaming umalis lahat... and... un... basta! Hehe...

I got home quite early... well, earlier than usual... and got to work... chopped, set the table, cleaned a couple of dishes... etc... etc... actually di ako ganung inutusan kasi kusa kong ginawa! Woohoo! Achievement yun for me...

And just when I patted myself at the back for a job well done dahil di nagtalak mom ko... aba... biglang nagsimula... ta-tat-ta-tat-ta-tat!! Hehe... anyway... enter left... exit right... or vice versa na lang.... didn't want to wreck my day... haiii...

Only gets me thinking... what could tuesday have in store for me??

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Thinking out loud:

Antagal na since nangyare yung mga nangyare today... infairness namiss ko yun... actually I was not seeing it as a moment... basta... eh... pinapansin ni kai eh... moment daw... it was more of bonding... one that we havn't had since... well, tagal na talaga! Tapos... well, I'm not really a touchy-feely person... sa dyosa lang ako ganun... at kay tita alfredo... kay kai nga hindi eh... di lang talaga ako sanay... plus we never do that... since... ever!... ewan, nailang ako... pero... ok lang... naku... nagsulit ata ako ng bonding time... mukhang bukas ala na... un pa... eh mukhang in demand un sa dami ng peer groups niya! Hehe...

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|12:59 AM|

Monday, March 20, 2006

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-031806-

~nafeel niyo na ba yung parang ang dami niyong nakikita at naririnig na bigla na lang nakokonek niyo sa isang tao kaya mo siya biglang maiisip? Or naiisip mo lang siguro ung tao kea nakokonek mo ung mga bagay sa kanya?~

ayun... kahapon? nagbahay-bahayan kami kela timo... woohoo... ansaya... namimitas ng mangga... nagluluto... kwentuhan... tawanan...

kaya lang... grabe... bitin! haiii... pero ang ganda talaga ng love actually...

"without hope or agenda... I just want to say that to me, you're perfect"

grabe... bitin talaga... ala man lang session! tapos... dota agad...

haiii... akala ko nga may lakad uli ngeong araw eh... pero well, di nakapagplano eh... miss ko na tuloy mga kasessions ko...

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~I'm falling even more in love with you...
~I'm letting go of all I've held on to...
~I'm standing here until you make me move...
~Just hanging by a moment here with you...

haiii... ano na ba talaga?! hanging by a moment o goodbye to you?! Phim!!! Gising!!!
----------------------------------------------

Just thinking out loud...

bat ka ganyan?! I know na wala kang ginagawa specifically para mafeel ko toh... pero lech... lalo pa kong natutuwa seo!! why do you have to speak that way... why do you have to joke that way... look –as in tingin- that way... act that way... dress that way... bat ka ganyan?? I know it's not your fault... and what I decide on won't matter to you... so sige, baka go with the flow muna... or not... or... ewan... well, no need to rush... ako lang naman apektado dito diba?! =) weird thing is... natutuwa pa rin ako sa nararamdaman ko... balik nanaman ako sa with no hope nor agenda... asteeg nga yun eh... no hope nor agenda... para di na lang umaasa... di masakit... kasi kung papafeel na special ka... pero wala naman pala... hirap pa un eh!...

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|9:31 PM|

Thursday, March 16, 2006

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~good bye to you...
~goodbye to everything that i knew...
~you were the one i loved...
~the one thing that i tried to hold on to...

today -sabi nila-, was supposed to be the last day we'd be spending in our room. we were supposed to turn it over kanina sa property. well, it didn't happen. why? beats me! hehe...

so since we were in the mood to reminisce. we decided to do so.. hehe. so we made a small circle to play, what else? but truth or dare or bare! hehe... well, xempre no one actually bared!

oo, this is indeed another session! hehe... well, it was a bit too straight forward for me... hirap sagutin at gawin nung dare ko... but anyway, as if naman they don't know yet right? so gO! hehe... tapos dota nung uwian...

heck whats new about that right? i really had fun... high ranker ako uli! hehe... well, i do have my moments of sort yipees and hoorays with dota... but its not really constant... hehe...

anyway... what to kwento pa... ala na... cant specify eh... what i see, what hear, what i feel... i should leave it there na eh... am so glad na kasama ung best friend ko sa session... atleast i can talk to someone about it... unlike what happened before... hehe... hirap kasi kimkimin eh... hai... nyway... that's that... nytie!

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|11:07 PM|

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

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abu... ano nga ba ang abu? hehe... it was my bulol way of saying i love you daw when i was a kid... pero when i asked my mom kung ano yung words ko for goodbye... sabi niya... abu din daw... hehe...

so ala lang... nasteegan lang ako na... abu actually means... i love you and goodbye... hehe

so how was today?
grabe... i'd like to update talaga pero haii... hirap na eh...

jists...
last thursday... nakapag one to one na uli ako... woohoo!!
last saturday... nakapagfellowship na uli ako!! yehey!!

ayun...
kanina? ahem... since yesterday ay 5th monthsary ng dyosa...
we decided na since NAT lang kanina... tuloy sa bahay for more sessions...

so... ano? ano nangyare?
session motto:
what i see, what i feel, what i hear...
when i leave i leave it here...

hehe... so ung ibang parts na lang... nood kami ng broke back mountain... sino-sino?
roll call: airon, car, jemai, lorie, steffi, niki, kai, abe, gret, j9, kams, ako, jed, aljon, alfredo, j.p., timo, ferdie, fidel... cno pa ba? ay si bry pa pala... hehehe...

grabe... di ko kinaya yung brokeback!! waaaaahh... anyway... natapos din naman namin... pero inatake ng hika si jeyps... so umuwi na sila ni pipay... sumunod na umuwi... sila gret, car, jemai, abe at alfredo...

so... session time... oras na para sagutin ang mga bagay na dapat klaruhin... hehe... ang survivors... lorie, niki, bry, kai, kams, timo, aljon, airon, fidel, ferdie at well ako... bahay ko toh eh... at ayun... humabol pa si kris...

after a while... umuwi na rin sila niki, lorie at bry... nung mga magseseven... so do the math... tapos... kaming mga natira, topic? wala... kung ano maisipan... ung sa side namin... nagpipilit magpakasenti... hehe... mga mageeight umuwi na rin si kams at kai...

aun ang mga natira... ako the last girl... timo, fidel, airon, aljon, ferdie at kris... tara session na na tunay... tungkol sa he says... she says... and the lot... grabe...

angd ami kong natutunan!! hehe... ang intellectual nung conversation... waha! asteeg talaga... kung pwede ko lang sana ishare... pero military secrecy kasi eh... hehe... nyway... it was super fun... sa mga natutunan ko... may mga bagay na naklaro sa aking mga iniisip... nararamdaman... at may mga bagay na nung biglang napagusapan... ay nakaya kong tawanan na lang!! hehe...

kaya toh!!... yun... sori kung ang vague... pero... ahehe... sa susunod kasi wag na uuwi ng maaga! wahaha... swerte ko sa bahay ko ginaganap toh... naku... bukas daw kela eron eh... hehe...

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|10:47 PM|

Monday, March 13, 2006

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this scene might get a bit hazy... but i'll definitely never forget it... so0o0obra!

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|12:38 PM|

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

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so... how did my day go?? it went swimmingly actually...
no... not because of someone special... it was just that today... ewan ko... i guess... i simply didn't care much... hehe...

i didn't over think things... i didn't let my thoughts dwell on one specific thing... and it felt so0o0 much lighter...

kaninang umaga... the whole class was pre-occupied because of our presentation for pinoy... hmmmm... the guys had their own group... region 6 sila... the dyosa's group -our group- was responsible for region 7... while the rest were grouped for region 8...

so ayun... almost on the spot presentation nanaman yung nangyare... hehe... anyway... the dyosa's pooled it off naman... woohoo!! hooray for us!!

tapos... last day ng C.A.T.... buti na lang naimpluwensyahan ako ni niki na magC.A.T.... enjoy talaga!! mamimiss ko din un... infairness!! hehe... kahit nabasa-basa ako dun... sus... ok lang!! hehehe...

anyway... those were the highlights of my day... i even had a small tampo with my dad... pero i still found my day to be fun... hehe... i guess salamat sa mga dyosa un... hehe... ewan... basta... it was fun... *period* hehe...

if anything more exciting happens with my life... hmmm... believe me... i'll have it posted! hehehe... basta at the moment... ok ako! hehe...

[[ phim took a step away and two steps forward at around... ]]*|9:34 PM|